corporate whore

My last day of freedom.

Tomorrow I start my SECOND job. Yeah, you heard me. So I will be working from 8:30 am to midnight about 5 times a week.

I am again serving the masses your modern day heroin–coffee. Hooray. I’m a drug dealer!

I need the money though. I need to buy clothes. I’ve been wearing the same sweater vest/stirrup pants combo since 1987. I’m starting to get weird looks.

I was merely hoping that my clothing would go so out of style that it would go back INTO style…goddamn, stirrup pants, big blue sweaters and ponytails to the side are going to come back in style!

But I’m tired of people throwing stuff at me.

In other news: I’m a broke ass (oh, wait I think I said that)

Since it was my last weekend of freedom, people were freaking out as if they will never see me again. So on Friday I went out with …somebody (god, I forgot!!) oh wait. whew. I saw Kill Bill with my friend’s sister (not that she’s my friend, but I hang out with the friend more). and had ice cream.

Saturday, I ran mad errands, had dinner with some old friends (Jender, John and Mycah), chatted online with Lobsterchick and Datchery for a bit and went to a party at midnight.

Sunday: I had lunch with Gina, Ryan and Vicki, had coffee with Stacy, had dinner (hooters!) with Spencer (well, failed dinner attempt) and a late movie with Jennifer, John and Jaymee (oh my god! I’m the only un-J!)

Now I’m going to two birthday parties. EGAD. I”m having water. I’m THAT broke. I can’t even afford to drive over there…alfred is taking me.

***
I saw Bubba-Hotep last night.

I think I’m going to end up being a campy B-director because I love campy B-movies..well, if they’re smartly written.

In this movie, this mummy, dressed in cowboy boots, is trying to suck the souls out the residents of a old people’s home. The way he sucks your soul out is out of your asshole.

So during this movie, you’re always thinking…DUDE WATCH YOUR ASSHOLE! And you get scared when the mummy is starting to suck on the old people’s asshole.

Anyway, so the two heroes of the movie are Elvis and JFK (Except in a political conspiracy, the part of his brain which was shot off is replaced with a bag of sand…and he’s black. BRILLIANT).

Now, this movie would be over in 5 minutes if it were like a healthy abled young lad.

But these are old people…Elvis with a bad hip and JFK in a motorized wheelchair. So, the fight scenes are them hobbling away from the mummy or hobbling (or wheeling) towards the mummy to try to light him on fire.

I wish more movies were like this. It had Bruce Campbell so now I have to watch Evil Dead II…because apparently, I would LOVE it.

If Starbucks doesn’t kill me first.

Oh, in adultery, remember, BJs don’t count.