three wholes

I am hella tired.

I say ‘hella’ because I just got back from San Francisco with my companions Gina and Ryan.

Some highlights:

I sneaked into the CSU college football field (the one that Berkeley plays on) and my friend Gina and I were pretending we just scored a touchdown. We were doing our football dance (well, I was on the ground, rolling around in excitement) and then we did that hit each other in the chest thing that football players do and BOOM!

Flashlight on our guilty asses.

“Can you get off the field please?” and this flashlight followed us until we ran and ran and ran up the steps (the gazillion steps) and out of the stadium.

And we have it on tape.

We have an amateur video which was actually a good and/or bad idea on however you think of it. I’m a pretty crazy person (especially on vacation) and I’ll do these stupid things on camera (like pretending I’m on a catwalk on the Golden Gate Bridge or playing Neo on the Matrix in the greek/drama theatre we sneaked into (We did a lot of sneaking around in S.F.) but I always always always regret my silly behaviour when I watch it on camera. I like to be BEHIND the camera not in front of it.

But you would never know it from this video.

Driving home, I tend to make up road-trip games. I made up this game where you say three statements about yourself, TWO of them false and ONE of them true. My friend Gina said this:

1. I took a frog’s leg and kicked it all around the school.
2. I had all three of my holes plugged at the same.
3. I had sex with two guys at the same time.

And when she said I had THREE OF MY HOLES PLUGGED AT THE SAME TIME, I nearly died in the car. What the fuck? (The true answer is the frog leg one which made me laugh even harder)

The next person, Mike, said this:

1. I throw stones at beehives
2. I had three of my holes plugged up at the same time
3. I kissed a girl.

And me and Ryan (we were in the backseat. I drove up to S.F., Gina, that sweet darling, drove down) looked at each other and said “What are your three holes?”

and Ryan said “Oh, god…did you plug the third one with pipe cleaner?”

The things you say on a roadtrip.